Learn Your Lesson Well

This has been a rough week for me. It’s my second week of training, and the strain of the extra activity is definitely beginning to show. It’s absolutely too early for me to be doing quite as much as I’m doing, but there’s no real way around it, especially now. It’s hard being in training, since I tend to find my need to focus on what I’m supposed to be learning tempered by my desire to sleep. It’s been a struggle, and I really want to make a good impression because I LOVE this job! At least, so far! Part of my training includes getting acclimated to the actual library I’ll be working at. It’s small and older, but I’ve enjoyed every minute of it that I’ve been there. All of my co-workers are so very nice, and it’s great to be able to work in a place where people are so ecstatic to have you there that they practically beg you not to leave.

I’ve made it a habit to make sure everyone I work with knows about my surgery, and knows what my limitations are for the time being. They’ve all be really supportive, and even scold me if they think I’m doing too much. It’s not always easy to be open about a surgical procedure I’ve learned, especially in the workplace. In this case though, it was the best option I had, and it’s gone swimmingly. I believe I’ve mentioned it before, but I want to talk about it now in depth. When I first decided to have the gastric bypass surgery back in 2002, I learned really quickly over the two years leading up to the actual event that you have to make careful decisions about who you’re going to tell, and who you’re not going to tell. Of course, I learned it the hard way. I told a couple people who were seemingly supportive to my face, then went and talked to my best friend, saying they thought I was taking the easy way out, or not trying hard enough, etc. These can be valid concerns, but anyone who knows me well should know me well enough to know that I never take the easy way out. Comments like this generally did come from acquaintances, and not close friends, but sometimes it came from family members too. One of the things we talked about in the nutrition and lifestyle training classes I had leading up to the gastric bypass was the fact that some friends and relatives may not be supportive of your decision, and for a variety of reasons. Some may be concerned about the risks, some may be jealous, some may worry that it will change your relationship with them, and some may just have personal aversions to plastic surgery. Whatever the reason, not everyone will react encouragingly, and you may not be able to avoid talking to them about it.

I’m the kind of person who, unless specifically told not to divulge something, cannot keep things from other people. If someone asks how I am, I’m generally going to tell the truth, even if they were just being polite in asking. I’m good at keeping confidences, but I hate feeling like I can’t speak openly about my life because I’m going to be judged. This proved to be very frustrating both before and after my gastric bypass, and it was something I wasn’t sure about how to handle with the circumferential paniculectomy either. There were two main things that made keeping this most recent surgery to myself. First, I had to start training an entire month before I would be back up to full strength - if I didn’t bring it up, it would affect how they viewed my job performance. Second, I had 30 lbs. of skin, fat and tissue removed from around my abdomen, and people don’t just wake up one morning with a completely different body. I decided to just be honest, and deal with the repercussions as they came. So far, the reviews have been mostly good. There’s always someone who wants to play a round of one-upsmanship with you, or who has nothing nice to say to anyone about anything. Otherwise, I’ve found that this surgery was a lot less controversial than the first, although I admit I haven’t seen everyone yet. Most of my family hasn’t seen my new body yet, and although they know about the surgery, mostly they’ve just asked my parents about how I’m doing whenever they call. I’m interested in seeing how the next family get-togethers go - I’ll be ready for them!